Verner Saves World

Verner Named Trump's National Security Advisor

Washington D.C., March 26, 2018

Noted dog lover and all-around nice guy Bill Verner was today named National Security Advisor, confounding pundits who had tapped noted foreign policy hawk John Bolton for the job. A White House spokesman confirmed the news with the release of the above photo, which shows the aging former stock wizard on the occasion of his birthday.

"I was really surprised this morning when I got the call from Trump offering me the job" said Verner in an interview with USA Today. "I thought my days advising the top decision-makers of the world were over" said the hirsute Verner from his Florida vacation home in St Petersburg, Florida.

"I have always respected Bill's cogent thought process and ability to effectively communicate complex ideas" said close friend Bob Decker, financial blogger, and wanna-be guitar god . "He was one of the best in the business, a real pro. It's a real coup to get the old war horse out of the barn for one last kick at the can! That's if he can remember where the door is".

His lovely wife, Marilyn Barefoot, will continue to support Bill's re-integration into the working world after years of enjoying a well-deserved retirement. "I have no doubt the world will be better for this, knowing what a generous spirit he brings to everything he attempts" said Barefoot, a highly successful entrepreneur and noted love sponge.

Trump seemed unfazed by Verner's contrasting style with his even keel and collegial approach to problem solving. In an early morning tweet Trump said "Bill will be the greatest NSA ever, a real fabulous hire - John Bolton is a loser - sad".

Verner (aka Uncle Heavy) will begin his role on April 1st, an appropriate date if there ever was one.

For more insight on this and other stories be sure to follow the highly compelling and sometimes accurate tuesat11.com blog.

Happy birthday Bill!

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